Updated April 2020
“Let’s play follow the leader Nanni,” my 3-year old grandson says, pulling on my hand. 

He leads me through the house, taking me downstairs and back upstairs. We crawl, we jump and we stand still; he laughs when I shadow him and is so delighted I’m following his lead. He then says, “Nanni its your turn to be the leader!”

After much laughter, we fall into a heap on the couch.  Fun and shenanigans like this make for some great memories.
 
Too bad leading a team isn’t quite that straightforward – or is it? 

​​So your team has been restructured and the dust finally settled.

Now, you’re supposed to go back to ‘business as usual’ but things feel far from normal. As the leader, you’re in a tough position because everyone on your team turns to you for answers and clarity. But, you're as much in the dark as they are, maybe a bit ticked off too....so what do you do?
 
Rest assured you’re not alone; heck, you can’t read a newspaper or hear a business report these days without learning about a company cutting back, laying off or reorganizing. 

Just like you, there are hundreds of leaders trying to find their way to get back on track, regrouping but also trying to rebuild trust of the ‘survivors’.

​Hey did you hear? Prime Minister Trudeau admitted there was an ‘erosion of trust’ occurring in his office; he was unaware of it (based on what came out in the recent Canadian justice committee inquiry). Imagine his disappointment to find that people did not feel comfortable coming to him with concerns.
 
Well sadly, he is not alone, many leaders realize a little late that there are issues or an underground culture (where they are excluded) in their workplace. It may not come to light until exit interviews, employee surveys or worse, formal complaints.

​I will never forget the first time I received tough feedback at work because lets face it, who can forget the moment when the are completely blindsided!

I was managing a government-funded employment centre at the time. While working on a tight deadline to implement a new computer system, I received quite a shock when the Director called me to come to her office ASAP.
 
She told me my peer (Margaret, who I worked with every day) had raised a concern that needed to be addressed immediately. Margaret felt ‘intimidated’ by me and I made her... uncomfortable. Instantly I became defensive – WTF?! Why didn’t she talk to me, what did I do, where was this coming from? Me, are you kidding me… intimidating?

Thanks for returning to my series about difficult people – I'll be interested to hear what do you think, so far? Do you see how difficult people can be a competitive advantage for your team?  Let me know in the comments below.
 
To recap part one of this series I began with “The Know All” (TKA) personality type, you surely know someone who embodies those traits. For part two I spoke about “The Revolutionary (aka TNT) type” who are seldom satisfied with the status quo.
 
For part three I will shed light on the all too familiar, yet quite challenging, difficult ‘Take No Prisoners’ (TNP) personality type.
 
Consider ‘the Donald’ reporting to a leader in a business setting. Yes, that is this rebel style.  What do you think, difficult to manage? Oh my, heck yeah! A true leadership test.
 
You may be surprised to know there ARE ways to harness the power of this rebellious in-yo-face type when they report to you (not so easy to when they are running a country).  When you guide them the right way, you create a powerhouse talent on your team and even better, leave a lasting positive impact in your company.
 
Meet Liam – The Gun-Slinger
Liam (names changed) is an up-and-coming, newly promoted executive in telecommunications. He is 33 years old and incredibly clever. So much so he has been promoted rather quickly. Over a 5-year period he has moved up three times (unusually fast) and is now at the Director level with eyes locked and loaded for a Vice President’s seat. He has been told he has “CEO potential”, which is amazing BUT he tends to share that info with others in an obnoxious ‘boasty’ sort of way.
 
Highly strategic and a quick study, he has demonstrated value in every role very quickly. Liam is highly action-oriented, capable to make change and adapt rapidly. Managers who promoted him looked past some of his behavioural shortcomings for political reasons - because the top bosses really like his boldness. Leaders fanned his fiery flames, instead of providing candid feedback and guidance, for fear they may be seen as a roadblock to his rise up the ladder.
 
When his newest manager Claire, VP Ops (seriously, not her real name or title) reached out for my help, she told me she inherited ‘a blow-hard, pompous, egotistical jerk.’  Claire was ultra motivated to find 'something' to hit home with him before everyone quit on her team. When we started, she was at her whit’s end.
 
Liam is the quintessential Take No Prisoners (aka TNP) profile.
 
The Take No Prisoners profile: 

• Intimidating
• Very confident in their own abilities
• They view themselves as special
• Disagree with anyone who doesn’t agree with them
• Appear aggressive, belligerent, insubordinate, rude and even malicious
• Not self aware
• Clever, always ready to win
• They surround themselves with people they trust who value their boldness
• They lash out at anyone who they feel threatened by

 
The benefit of having a TNP on your team – quick decision makers, they assess risk swiftly, are very determined, action oriented, inventive, shrewd and persistent.
 
The key to leading a TNP is trust and mutual respect. Set high expectations regarding their behaviour; hold a mirror up to see results of their approach; be liberal with praise at the right times. Listen to their ideas, positively reinforce relationship building, and be candid with feedback that will benefit them with very firm correction if they appear to burn a bridge – they appreciate that directness.
 
Caution for leading a TNP – they require a firm leader whom they respect or they will undermine your efforts. Do not do battle with them as they are very clever, set clear boundaries early on, then hold them to those. 
 
The Outcome

My approach was to have her build a real genuine connection and be very firm with expectations and harness the positive side of his traits.

Claire began to develop two-way trust with Liam:

• Asked questions about him, his family, his background and how he sees himself. Began to get him to open up about areas he wanted to focus on. She shared her journey to VP candidly, opening about mis-steps she made thus making connection to his own story and aspirations.

She set high expectations:

• Demonstrating her support to helping him to prepare for next level leadership by reinforcing the most critical leadership skills to cultivate – self-awareness, empathy and supportiveness to others (despite levels).

She showed support through her own actions:

• Made time to listen to the challenges he experienced, then through questioning techniques vs telling, she caused him to reflect on situations. (How did your conversation with X go; What could you have said differently to build a bridge with them; Do you think they heard your message).

And encouraged his self reflection:

• We did an Everything DiSC Workplace® assessment with him – no surprise he was a ‘D’ Dominant style. I provided a confidential debrief with him of his assessment and gained further insight for how I may help Claire to connect with him (She is an ‘I’ Influencer). I validated what he was willing to share with her.
• They plan to do a few other activities in future because he professed and acknowledges some blind spots (huge progress right there).

We are well on our way with Liam. Thankfully he is smart enough to know that when other people truly want to help him succeed, they are worth listening to.

I hope to become an executive coach to him one day and if I do, I won’t pull any punches. He needs direct feedback to help him succeed; learn how to flex his style yet capitalize on what makes him a powerhouse in business.

Could people perceive YOU to be like Liam? Or do you know anyone with this style?
 
Help is Available
For every difficult type of person there is a way of connecting to the jewel that may be under a rough exterior. It can take a bit of work on your behalf but having distinctly different personalities on your team can become a strong competitive edge as well as a leadership legacy.
 
If you are suffering with a difficult person on your team (or your boss) and you’d like help to figure out how to communicate better with them, send me an email.   There are numerous ways to connect!
 
If you aren’t on my mailing list, you’re missing out on other juicy tidbits to become an effective leader. It is never too late to sign up! I have sign up links all over my site, for your convenience. 🙂

In part one of this series I introduced how to develop a competitive edge while leading difficult people. I began with “The Know All” (TKA) personality type. 
 
For part two I’ll focus on another challenging personality, this one is seldom satisfied with the status quo and constantly wants to make changes!
 
The Revolutionary…. aka “TNT”
 
Making it Right
I often compare this type of person to Mike Holmes, the builder who seemingly blows up your house to fix all the wrongdoings done by previous contractors to ‘Make it Right’.
 
This kind of person on your team can really test you, pushing at every turn with complaints about process, hand-offs, policy or people. They expect you to fix it.
 
For the conscientious manager this TNT type is very draining to have on your team. You may pride yourself on good quality work like they do, however you’re more apt to be cautious and comfortable with subtle improvements vs high confrontation or making full-scale change.
 
These people can be rather domineering in conversations. They have strong opinions, and even though you may see value in their suggestions, they can be tough to redirect back to work.
 
Rather than doing battle with them, there are ways you can help to leverage their enthusiasm for the greater good!
 
Meet Sati – the Demolition expert
 
Lets take Sati for example (names changed). Sati works for a sales organization as a technical rep and has been there for almost 10 years. She is well liked by both peers and customers, so much so they turn to her to solve all sorts of problems.  Sati has a habit of adopting other people’s issues, making them her own to solve, even when they are not in her domain.
 
Her Sales Manager Brian really struggled to get Sati focussed on her own deliverables. Almost daily she would come to him with yet another idea to change...well…pretty much everything. Many conversations began with “Why don’t we....”, “I don’t see why I have to…”, “Why can’t x department do…”. She just constantly challenged.
 
Brian was recently been promoted and knew Sati had some great ideas from working with her as a peer. As the days and weeks followed however, he found her increasingly frustrating to work with.  Poking at him day in day out with yet another scheme she wanted him to undertake and fix, yet did not follow through on her own work.
 
Sati is a great example of this Revolutionary – TNT difficult person.
 
The TNT profile

• See opportunities to improve everywhere...else, not likely them self
• Resists working on other people’s agenda
• Always has an opinion
• May have difficulty seeing details
• Sees process and rules as optional
• Frequently invents new ways
• Gets bored with routine
• Often likes to be centre of attention

 
The benefit of having a TNT person on your team – they are opportunistic, filled with ideas, usually very positive, they influence others, thrive on change, deal well with ambiguity and love problems to solve.
 
The key to leading a TNT person is hearing out their ideas and giving them accountability to see changes through. Set expectations for detailed change plans outlining the risks/rewards and benefits to implementing such a change. They do best when they are heard, given meaningful accountabilities with autonomy to implement and are trusted to get it done.
 
Caution for leading a TNT – they need a diligent leader to be available for them, not too hands on, yet someone who sets expectations, timelines then follows through. They need to be heard.
 
The Outcome
After Brian and I laid out a plan he implemented a few strategies:

1. The first 15-20 mins of Sati’s one on one Brian primarily listened and took notes. Then he would ask Sati to prioritize proposals she made: identifying the ones of most importance and clarifying why, who would benefit from them and how.
2. He would then provide her with meaningful candid feedback about the suggestions, letting her know what would be helpful to work on, which ideas she ought to direct her passion toward and which ones were out of bounds, explaining why.
3. Lastly, he asked her to take on one item to resolve on her own and would follow up with her at the next 1:1. She could ask questions along the way but it was hers to take on and figure out.

By doing this, it would redirect her exuberance to accomplish something beneficial versus dropping her ‘dynamite’ bombs and walking away.
 
In the following weeks Brian noticed a change in Sati. She stopped the incessant pushing and began to take ownership of some of the issues, working diligently to resolve.
 
Weekly they would meet to discuss progress and Brian began to mentor her on how to look deeper into the details. Sometimes she would actually abandon an issue but not until she had more thoroughly explored it and considered the impact(s).
 
Now Brian is well on his way to becoming a stronger leader and Sati is becoming a greater contributor, not only to the team, but also the organization.
 
For every difficult type of person there is another way to look at what they bring to your team. It can take some effort on your part but encouraging people the right way, who previously were a pain, can actually turn into a competitive edge toward a highly productive team.

Join/sign up for our blog updates (link in right margin), or visit often for other useful tips on leading people!
 
If you are tired of struggling to deal with a difficult person on your team (or your boss) and you’d like help to figure out how to communicate with them, send me an email.   I have a kit bag full of different tactics that work!

Watching political leaders wrangle for position, launch smear campaigns and talk trash about each other sure fires up the leadership coach in me. Grown adults identified as so-called “leaders” who choose bully tactics, intimidation and demeaning others as their campaign strategy gets to me every. single. time!
 
The Canadian province where I live is currently embroiled in a smear-filled provincial election fraught with insults and put-downs; it is such a miserable and appalling ‘gong show’ - wish I could bong the gong to put an end to this conduct! 
 
I am not naïve enough to think anyone could simply fix what seems to be wrong with such political behaviour overnight but I hope I live long enough to witness a group of leaders stand and face the masses, clearly state their position, demonstrate what they believe in (without being wishy-washy) and then once elected, set a concrete plan working to get it done in a professional “principled” fashion.
 
In my books, everyone in a leadership position, regardless if they’re running for office or managing a team of 2-20,000 people can be a better leader by leading with principles.
 
My Kind of Principled Leadership

• Set vision with values - Develop a longer term and lofty end goal, big picture wise. Be clear about what success looks like when the goal(s) is reached. Clarify the code of behaviour you expect people to demonstrate.  Model and reinforce those values in everything YOU do so that people on your team see you act appropriately as a part of normal course of business, showing that values are not just words on a page.

• Treat your people right – From the moment you meet them until the day either you or they leave the company, give people your attention, be considerate, show thankfulness and give them the right guidance for their role (or level) with enough space and autonomy to get their work done well.

• Seek feedback and act on it – In my experience many people leaders think they seek feedback; they ask their people in general terms 'how's it going'; they tell everyone they have an ‘open door’ - just come talk to me; they may even ask directly for feedback how they are doing as a leader. These are all good but frequently these methods miss the mark for obtaining really candid and honest, actionable feedback.  Many leaders aren't prepared to accept candour or how to acknowledge or act on it when they actually hear something they don’t like or agree with.  The result – they live in a naive happy little, yet precarious bubble with potential to burst when good people leave their team.

 
Note: Seeking, receiving and acting on feedback are skills many of us need to develop further. If you have yet to receive constructive criticism from your people about YOU, it is a good sign you have room to grow. If you have received it, consider it a great gift! Now, how did you address it?

• Be a legacy builder – to me, building a legacy involves planning how to replace YOU while doing impactful work. Whether you’re a corporate leader or an entrepreneur, build succession into your business mindset. It is a critical failure point for a thriving small business if someone can’t pick up the reigns when you’re not around. In a corporate environment, absence of developing succession talent can be a good reason to ‘kick-you-to-the-curb’. Great leaders build other leaders, not just workers. Most businesses I’ve worked with in the past have gone out of their way to source, recruit and cultivate leaders who could build other leaders.  It is simply best practice.

 
The Core Principles in Action
One senior level corporate leader I worked with (Katrina McGee….yah, not her real name) truly exemplified the core principles I look for as a Principled Leader.
 
Such a pleasure to work with. I recall one time we were working on a very sensitive and difficult message about a pending reorganization (sadly, one of many). It was a very stress-filled period for her. She painstakingly agonized about every change to the department and fretted over each and every word choice because she personally felt the impact of the tough decisions being made – people truly mattered to her. 
 
We were working in her office around 9pm at night, long after others had gone home, when we heard the cleaner in the outer office area singing quite passionately to himself with headphones on. He passed by her door a couple of times - clearly he hadn’t noticed us but we did him. Instead of getting annoyed at the “I hope he buys you flowers” being belted out, she asked if we could take a quick break.
 
She collected up the garbage from around her room and grabbed a fresh bottle of water from her sideboard and went to the outer office. She startled him as she emptied her bin into his cart and then took a moment to chat, giving him the bottle of water and acknowledged his singing prowess. It was obvious they had spoken before as they shared a little chuckle before she returned to the office.
 
You see, she treated everyone with that level of respect and consideration - from the cleaner to every member of her global team to her C-suite colleagues. So genuine was her care for everyone that I can honestly say anybody who ever had the opportunity to work with her would go to the end of the earth to support her agenda.  A master at Principled Leadership I would say!
 
I know most of you want to be that kind of leader too. Here are some of the core principles that make all the difference to the teams who look to you as a leader:
 
People Matter
Principled Leaders put the interests of people first.  Their every action sends a message that everyone is equal and their ideas and opinions matter.  It doesn’t mean they will do everything people want, but they ensure their teams feel heard and acknowledged.
 
Respect is Earned
Principled Leaders operate with respect for others in everything they do – there is no put down, no intimidation or bullying. They gain the respect of others by treating others fairly and with respect, regardless of their position.
 
Attitude Counts
Principled Leaders have a positive attitude. They act in a positive, genuine manner, even during some of the toughest times, ensuring everyone remains calm and productive.
 
Consistency is the Key
Principled Leaders are who they are regardless of the situation. Whether riding the elevator, walking through the office or sitting in a board meeting, their every move is consistent and in-line with their good character.
 
Curiosity is a Game Changer
Principled Leaders love learning and knowing but will acknowledge openly they actually don’t know everything. They ask a million questions of people – how does that work, why does that happen, why can’t we do that, how can we make it happen. This inquisitiveness comes in handy, seldom are they duped and inevitably they know exactly who to go to if help is needed because they understand the roles/process in their team as well as other groups.
 
Delivering is their Jam
Principled Leaders are obsessed with getting done what they set out to do. They are doggedly determined. They make sure all of their team understand the mission and remain steadfast in overcoming whatever obstacles are in the way to deliver on their promises.
 
Can you measure up to being a Principled Leader? Of course you can! You’re likely well on your way if you took time out to read this article and thought about what you currently do!
 
Keep Dots Leadership Solutions in mind as you determine your own development needs and plans for improvement. I’d like to be your personal and confidential leadership development guide. My coaching clients will tell you I hold them accountable to deliver against any goals they set passing along many tips and tactics to help them be a Principled Leader.

​My style is direct (don't worry, I won't bong the gong on you), yet highly supportive and I bring 25+ years of experience working with leaders from many different industries both big and small – give me a call or drop me an email when you’re ready.

Last month we focused on the letter “S” – Steadiness of the DiSC behavioural style.
 
This month concludes the Style Talk Series as we focus on the profile “C” – Conscientious characteristics. You may also like to review the first two parts of the series focusing on the profile "D"- Dominance, or focusing on the profile "I"- Influence.
 
As previously mentioned, in each article I am highlighting real-life clients who tend to illustrate a strong profile of just one of the DiSC behavioural traits. 
 
You will have different degrees of each behavioural style in your own profile but you tend to have a dominant style that many at your work will witness. How you behave compared to people with differing styles to you may be quite different, even when presented with the very same scenario. 

Meet Nadeem (not his real name)
Nadeem is an Accounting Advisory Executive with a leading professional services firm. Nadeem has traveled the world, offering advice on accounting and risk management for 15+ years and is considered a leader in this field.
 
Nadeem has led large, matrixed teams, working on highly complex projects with large multi national corporations providing advice and guidance on Accounting and Tax.

• Nadeem is known best for being accurate, precise, detail-oriented, and highly conscientious. He is very analytic and operates systematically, making decisions carefully with plenty of research and information to back it up.

 

• He has high exacting standards for both himself and others. His focus on detail enables him to see what many other people overlook; he is a great problem solver because he draws upon creative solutions based on many years of experience.

 

• As a team member Nadeem brings unique perspective and acts as the "anchor of reality". When something is proposed, Nadeem will think through every detail. He makes realistic estimates and will openly voice the problems he may see.

 

• Nadeem is very meticulous and even tempered. He is committed to seeing tasks fully completed. He takes great pride in doing work accurately and is the ‘go to’ person to analyze, research, or test information.

 

• He has excelled in the consulting environment, avoiding politics by remaining focused on the work. He is highly independent and works well in this specialized field where tasks are clear, detailed and requires following procedure to meet deadlines. He is counted on to deliver.

 

• Nadeem, as a leader is instructive; he is factual as well as supportive, setting high expectations for his team. He gives direct feedback, in fact, he doesn’t hold back. Typically he relies on facts and data vs commentary and feelings to describe performance. To some, this is harsh.

 

• As a result, Nadeem can be perceived as cold or uncaring. It is perceived he overlooks social cues when communicating in person thus being unaware of peoples' reaction. He gets down to business quickly, without taking much time to make a personal connection in most interactions. 

 

• His heavy reliance on detail makes it awkward for him to see a broader perspective in the firm. When he finds problems or perceives a risk, he will avoid decisions which can slow down projects or initiatives he leads.

 

• Nadeem is an instinctive organizer, he can create and maintain systems very well. His drive for consistency, logic, and accuracy helps him cut through political barriers and other 'noise' that otherwise could derail colleagues. He always can be counted on to ask important questions that emphasize quality and/or logic, and will seek a diplomatic approach and consensus within groups.

 

• From a development perspective, Nadeem aspires to make Partner in the firm. He has been told he will need to focus on doing the right things and not just doing things right. Nadeem needs to be more open and accepting to others' ideas and methods. As well as organize his team to contribute to goals, not just do them on his own or by allocating task work.

 

• Building relationships is a critical skill to move up in the firm and for him to be taken seriously for more senior level leadership. This requires more concentration for Nadeem on people development; making it deliberate to work with other people rather than working on his own.

 

• Nadeem has received feedback that he is aloof and may see himself as 'better than others'.  This is not the first he has received this insight but he struggles with creating personal connection with people at work.

 
We have identified for Nadeem that he needs to pick up on social cues and demonstrate interest in others. This includes taking a brief time in the first part meetings to greet people and chat for a moment, assess his audience then communicate in a way the other party feels valued.
 
Nadeems’s development plan includes coaching on relationship building. Some areas include meeting preparation; helping him to assess the people he will meet so he is more prepared to make the right first impression. Also we are doing DiSC assessments with each of his direct team to help him decode their styles. Lastly he is working with an internal mentor who has the exact opposite style to his so they can learn to appreciate their differences. In future this will arm him for analyzing people and provide a roadmap for flexing his communication style accordingly.
 
Do you know anyone like Nadeem?  Or can you see yourself in his profile? He is a good representative of a strong “C” behavioural style.
 
Can you imagine how it may benefit to you to better understand your own DiSC style and how your style may impact others?  
 
Once you see how your style affects people you work with, you can adapt accordingly.
 
Likewise as you leverage team dynamics using DiSC assessment, you can find ways to pair people for the best outcomes as well as anticipate where friction may occur.
 
Do you want your own DiSC Assessment?
Email me to reveal the secrets of success.  Everything DiSC Workplace® assessment is a great tool to use with your whole team. This assessment will decode how best to communicate for your own success. It makes a great foundational piece for business planning, improving employee engagement and team development.
 
Not only will you receive a detailed report but I will also provide a confidential debrief that delves into your personal profile and/or team dynamic. Drop me a line when you’re ready to learn more about yourself and discuss potential career/leadership derailers so you know how to head them off!

Last month we focused on the letter “I” – Influence of the DiSC behavioural style and previously we focused on the “D”.
 
This month we will continue the Style Talk Series focusing on the profile “S” – Steadiness behaviours and communication characteristics.
 
As I mentioned before, the clients I highlight tend to be symbolic of a strong profile of just one of the DiSC behavioural dimensions, this month using the “S”. 
 
In your own DiSC profile you will have differing degrees of each behavioural style. That said, people at work likely have observed your most predominant one because when you are under pressure your most dominant style usually shows up.
 
There is no perfect style, no right or wrong either; just like people are from different backgrounds, we each view a situation and react uniquely because we are approaching it from a different vantage point. This series is to help introduce the benefits of understanding your style.
 
Meet Melissa (not her real name)
Melissa is a Senior level Human Resource Business Partner for a global financial institution. Melissa has been in HR (different departments) for most of her 20+ career.
 
She currently supports over 40 executives (various levels) who collectively have over 2000 employees. Her day-to-day work is strategic, focused on providing business executives’ HR advice, shaping and implementing strategic plans. Melissa is keen to be promoted to VP level.

• Melissa is known for being even-tempered, reliable, and predictable. She views the world positively. She is very friendly, sympathetic with others, and very generous of her time. She is recognized for being understanding and a great listener.

 

• As a team member Melissa is the ‘harmony keeper’. She is the one everyone talks to about his or her troubles. She strives for consensus and will work to reconcile any conflicts should they arise.

 

• Melissa tends to be a rule follower; she is highly respectful of authority and a loyal team player. She works best when there is respect for procedure and continuity in process.

 

• She is doggedly determined to see tasks through to the end and she will juggle many tasks and take on quite a bit but always complete her work. A very dependable partner.

 

• Melissa can be perceived as a bit shy until she gets to know you, she doesn’t dominate discussion and is quick to fall back and let those around do most of the talking. She genuinely enjoys people, but prefers to open up with individuals and groups that she trusts and feels most comfortable to be around.

 

• She has flourished in work environments that have consistent protocols in place and are low on conflict. She is able to help guide others through tumult and change quite effortlessly but withdraws if conflict is directed at her or if there is indecisive leadership.

 

• Melissa has a natural ability to create process and procedure and prefers to ensure everyone follows accordingly, becoming frustrated with people who skip steps or miss important detail. She is methodical in her approach to work and seldom misses a thing.

 

• As a leader Melissa is supportive, generous with praise, helpful and clear about what needs to be done and how.  Her team can count on her; she doesn’t flip flop and always stays the course.

 

• She can become perturbed if there are multiple changes in direction and struggles communicating to her team during these high stress periods until she has had a chance to review and understand. This can appear to be slow to respond to the team.

 

• Melissa can become quiet and defensive when working with someone who enjoys conflict and debate. She prefers to avoid confrontation and will, in some cases, back down from her opinion or side-step a heated discussion.

 

• From a development perspective, to move up to a more senior level, Melissa has to become more comfortable with change and the ambiguity it will inevitably bring. She can make a best guess decision without every bit of data to ensure work continues to flow drawing on her tremendous amount of experience. She would do well to surround herself with others she trusts who will help her assess more quickly.

 

• She has a perfectionistic tendency that causes her to work longer hours than necessary; she needs to embrace the art of delegation and leveraging others strengths vs taking it on.

 

• Melissa has received feedback that she may be mistaken for meek, giving others to believe she is a push over who will relent and agree when hard-pressed. She is actively working on changing this perception.

 
We have identified that for Melissa to move up, she needs to command more authority. Colleagues, leadership and clients enjoy working with her but to be ready for the next move she has to prove she can manage conflict directly and comfortably. 
 
Showing she can stand her ground and be more direct in her communications will give senior leaders more confidence in her capabilities at the next level.
 
Melissa’s development plan includes coaching courageous confrontation, role-playing in a safe environment using real-life scenarios and critiquing conversations.  Through routine practice she will develop comfort in finding her voice, without sacrificing her strong values for harmony.
 
Do you know anyone like Melissa? Or can you see yourself in her profile? She is a good representative of a strong “S” behavioural DiSC style.
 
Imagine the benefit to you to better understand your own DiSC style and how you impact other people?  
 
Once you see how your style affects people you work with, you can modify appropriately.
 
Likewise when your team uses DiSC assessment as a development tool, you will better understand the dynamic of everyone within the team.  Some people may be a lot like you when others are not, you will see how to get the best out of everyone when you learn how to communicate to their style.
 
Time for your own DiSC Assessment?
Email me to reveal the secrets of success.  Everything DiSC Workplace® assessment is a great tool to use with your whole team. This assessment will decode how best to communicate for your own success. It makes a great foundational piece for business planning, improving employee engagement and team development.
 
Not only will you receive a detailed report but I will also provide a confidential debrief where we will into your personal profile and/or team dynamic. Drop me a line when you’re ready to learn more about yourself and discuss potential career/leadership de-railers so you know how to head them off!

Last month we focused on the letter “D” – Dominance of the DiSC behavioural styles.
 
This month we will continue the Style Talk Series focusing on the profile “I” for Influence behaviours and communication style.  I personally relate most with this dimension myself, though not quite to the same extreme as my client. 
 
As you will see, the client I am highlighting tends to be emblematic of a strong “I” profile which is just one of the DiSC behavioural traits. 
 
You will have varying degrees of each behavioural style in your own profile but we all have our ‘go to’ dominant style that others tend to see, particularly under stress. Two people may react quite differently when presented with the same situation, depending on their dominant behavioural style.
 
Meet Daniel (not his real name)
Daniel is a Senior Vice President for a national Sales organization that employs 4000+ people across Canada. Daniel worked his way up to a senior level over 18 years of progressive moves.
 
He joined the company directly from University, when he began as an intern in Customer Operations gathering customer information from clients to prepare for year 2000 cut over.

• Daniel has always been seen as outgoing and a people person. Long before he led people he was seen as enthusiastic team member who connected quickly with the customer. He naturally developed relationships and was easily liked.

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• Daniel is an innovative, out-of-the-box thinker, always seeking creative solutions to issues. He learns faster than most – a ‘quick-study’. He is skilled at garnering interest in just about everything, he engages people smoothly and effectively.

 

• He creates a positive, motivated work environment filled with enthusiasm and low on conflict. Most people love to work with Daniel because he is so charismatic, upbeat and optimistic, even when there is a lot of change.

 

• As a leader, Daniel is highly collaborative and he trusts his team to deliver. He is quick to delegate and leave important matters with his team, almost to a fault. Sometimes they are not fully equipped to handle the issues.

 

• Daniel avoids detail, he tends to focus on the plus side of information and not go too deep into specifics.

 

• He is a sought after speaker on several topics he is passionate about. He reads an audience quickly, assessing what they need to know, making quick adjustment to ensure the information connects. Daniel can make even the most complex information easy for anyone to understand.

 

• He tends to move from one thought to another swiftly, sometimes frustratingly so.  People around him don’t find it quite as easy to change topics. When others are looking for data and facts he can exasperate them by glossing over the specifics.

 

• Daniel also uses time in meetings to socialize, talking about unrelated topics. As a result, he can be seen as long-winded. This aggravates those who want him to stick to the facts, get to the point and avoid personal discussion.

 

• Over the years Daniel has worked best with managers who gave him plenty of opportunity to share and implement his recommendations. He has many helpful ideas and enjoys discussing them and gaining support. To his manager’s credit she would often pair him with others to develop detailed implementation plans leaving Daniel out front to pave the way with stakeholders.

 

• Not surprisingly, managers who rejected his input or shutdown ideas in meetings were the ones he didn’t have a great relationship with.  When he was a mid level leader in Customer Operations, his manager would often nag for routine reports and constantly follow up as if he was a poor performer – he says that was the worst year in his career.

 

• Daniel didn’t set out to work in Sales, he didn’t see himself as a ‘salesperson’, more like a fixer. However he soon learned that solving customer issues through the selling the right product was very rewarding; leading others to do the same was a great fit.

 

• From a development perspective Daniel has had to learn to resist being impulsive in decision-making and to take time to listen to others who did the research. He is working on slowing down his speech and stream of thoughts to give others time to absorb and allow them to question him.

 

• He received feedback that he is perceived as a poor listener. This was a surprise and blindsided him as he genuinely cares for his team. He is working on active listening techniques to ensure he improves this perception. Additionally he is working on time management, using strategies from the book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey.

 
For Daniel to continue to move up in the organization he must take more time to consider data and facts; use solid supporting evidence to help formulate decisions, and incorporate facts into his narrative.
 
He is seen as a promotable resource for the business, he may be considered for President or CEO of a smaller division in the future.
 
Daniel’s development plan includes an executive coach (external) as well as internal mentorship from the CFO, who is giving him guidance and support to develop data-driven decision making.
 
Do you know anyone like Daniel?  Or do you see yourself in his profile? He is a good representative of a strong “I” behavioural style.
 
Can you imagine the benefit to better understand your own DiSC style and how you may impact others?  
 
Once you grasp how your style affects people you work with, you adapt accordingly. Likewise as you build a team, you can better understand the dynamic of everyone within the team.  Some may strike sparks with you, yet they bring tremendous benefit overall when you learn how to communicate to their style.
 
Time for Your Own DiSC Assessment?
Email me to take advantage of the insightful perspective of Everything DiSC Workplace®
assessment or to arrange a session with your whole team. This assessment will decode how best to communicate for your own success.
 
Not only will you receive a detailed report but I will also provide a confidential debrief where we will delve into your personal profile and/or team dynamic. Drop me a note when you’re ready to learn more about yourself and discuss potential career/leadership de-railers so you know how to head them off!

Ever work with someone whose style drove you crazy? Perhaps they talked too slow or fast for you, were overly demanding or passive, very logical or maybe they talked so much about feelings and relationships to the point it made it difficult to get down to business? The list of bugaboos vary because what bugs one person, may not bother another to the same degree.

We each have a unique combination of behaviours and priorities; they show up as our style to others. When you work with someone whose blend is quite different to yours, they will likely strike a nerve - when you're not well-armed to understand where they are coming from.

Assess for Your Own ‘Ah Ha!’ Moment
One way to ease this kind of discord is to conduct an assessment that decodes both you and your team’s behavioural styles. A tool to understand clear preferences and what they prioritize compared to you. 

My tool of choice is a DiSC® model behavioural assessment tool – Everything DiSC®Workplace by Wiley Brand.  It's simple, yet uncovers ‘pinch points’ quickly with leaders and/or their teams so they can adjust immediately. This tool works for building better cohesion in a team, improving communication, reducing tensions, but also offers self-awareness for leaders I coach, most of whom have a few ‘ah ha’ moments as a result!

Over the next series I highlight each one of the four dimensions of DiSC® characterized by people I’ve worked with (names changed, of course) quick links below:

• Disc Style 'I'
• DiSC Style 'S'
• DiSC Style 'C'

DiSC®Background
Harvard psychologist Dr. William Moulton Marston created the theory of DISC® in the 1920’s, illustrating that people exhibited emotions through four ‘Normal’ behaviours of Dominance, Inducement, Steadiness, or Compliance – aka DISC® In the 1950’s an industrial psychologist named Walter Clarke went on to create the first assessment using the DISC behaviours Marston founded. Over the years the assessment has been improved and updated but the principles remain the same. Today we use the terms: Dominance, Influence, Steadiness and Conscientious in the assessment.

First lets start with the profile of “D” – Dominance.

Meet Belinda (not her real name)
Belinda is a Vice President in a Customer Service group (Canada) of a large multi national company. She moved up through the ranks fairly fast. Here are some of her traits and behaviours that demonstrate a strong “D” profile:

• Belinda is known as a leader who takes charge and for some she is seen as aggressive and rather pushy.  To others she is the ‘go-to’ for getting some of the most difficult issues resolved, counted on to deliver time and again.
• She makes decisions quickly and decisively. She has been acknowledged for a long list of accomplishments. Her expectations of people are to act rather than study or ponder options, often asking why things aren’t done yet. She can push others quite hard, seemingly unaware of their needs, yet quick to delegate to those who are keen.  
• People who share her interest in accomplishment do well working with her. Anyone working with her can expect her to be very direct; they always know where they stand, it is no secret with Belinda. 
• She is outcome focused and sees the bigger picture rather than all the details it will take to get something done. In any customer-related crisis, Belinda knows exactly what to do.  She is able to provide her people context for how what they do will affect the customer and the overall business.
• Depending on the person she reports to she may nudge (shove, go around or annoy) them to pull rank and push others in other groups to get things done if she isn’t seeing results fast enough. She worked best with leaders who gave her high autonomy yet would become highly frustrated with bosses who questioned or blocked her ideas.
• Belinda always has goals and is determined to become the Country General Manager.
• From a development perspective she’s been told that people perceive her as a poor listener and a bully.  She knows she pushes people but that is what she thinks it takes to make work happen. She knows the steps to listen more actively, though finds it is a challenge, as she just wants to get things done. She is working on consensus building with others affected by her decisions. 
• She also received feedback that her tone and body language show displeasure when she is frustrated.  She has difficulty holding back her views on most subjects.

Do you know someone like Belinda?  Or can you see a little of yourself in her profile?  She is a good representative of a strong “D” behavioural style.  Most of us have behavioural styles with varying degrees of each of the 4 DiSC® dimensions so certain circumstances may bring your “D” more to the forefront.  

For Belinda to be considered for future, more senior level roles she must make an effort to develop work relationships by recognizing the opinions, feelings and ideas from others. Taking time to get to know people versus putting them to work.

Without some coaching, guidance and support from others, Belinda’s trajectory in a large multinational company will surely be hampered. Much of her advancement will depend on whom she reports to and whether she reigns in her power punches!

Can you see the benefit to you to better understand your own DiSC® style and how you may impact others?  Or to decode your team members so you can find the right way to communicate with them?

Get Your DiSC® Assessment!
Email or call me to take advantage of the eye-opening perspective of Everything DiSC® Workplace assessment or to arrange a session with your whole team. This assessment will surely provide a clearer understanding of how you affect others and decode how best to communicate for your own success.

Not only will you receive a detailed report but you will also have a confidential debrief with me where we will delve into your personal profile and/or team dynamic.

Call or email me when you’re ready to learn more about yourself and discuss potential career/leadership de-railers so you know how to head them off!

Hanging out with my grandson the other day he told me about a neighbourhood bully who makes ‘bad choices’. We had a great conversation about people who make bad choices, particularly bullies. In his vast wisdom of nearly 5 years, my grandson told me ‘Bullies are people too but its not OK when they hurt other people and if they do, then a grown up has to give them a time-out.’

What a thoughtful leadership lesson in this little statement. After all, we use time-outs with children to make them think about their actions, they must apologize and we expect them to do differently so they learn from their experience. So why don’t we tackle bullies in the workplace with the same energy - especially people in a power position over others?
 
What Would You Do?
You know the headlines these days are dominated by allegations of sexual harassment; victims are speaking out about their nasty experiences, almost daily - a topic seldom talked about before. Women everywhere have been emboldened to speak up and share their personal stories of sexual harassment and inappropriate behaviour in work situations. With every news story, it triggers another woman's courage to speak out. Rest assured, there will be more to come.

Will you know how to manage an allegation at work if someone in your company or organization turns to you for help? 
 
Policy and Practices Start with YOU, not HR!
Lets face it; dialogue about sexual harassment makes most of us uncomfortable. Anything ugly is difficult to speak about, but open discussion is vital to bring about improvement. It really concerned me when I read the Globe & Mail article that '94 percent of Canadian's leaders believe sexual harassment isn't an issue.' 

Given harassment has become such a hot topic, every company should recognize that sexual harassment IS a real problem. It is time for leaders, or anyone in a position to help, to stand up, call out and follow through with discipline for inappropriate behaviour. No one should ever feel harassed at work, particularly if it is unwanted and sexualized in nature. It’s just not ok, regardless of how you qualify or explain it away as ‘that is how it is here’. 

Turning a blind eye to anyone’s harassment claim can make worldwide headlines within a few hours through social media when they don’t get the help they need. So #Time's Up on covering up transgressions of anyone, especially senior level leaders or officials. 

This is tough stuff to handle but there are steps you can take, immediately, to prevent all forms of harassment from happening at your work. Lets look at how you can create work environments where both men and women feel safe to bring forward concerns and get support rather than feeling they have to go public or leave the company. 

Think ‘METALS’ - Leadership Steps to Say #Times Up
 
1. Model. Everyone is watching you whether you know it or not. Don’t speak inappropriately about women (or men); leave any form of sexual innuendo out of the workplace – sexual dialogue does not belong in a work environment. Help your team remain respectful in every interaction, show them how you manage with respect. You are the one your team will imitate, so show people the right way to treat others.
 
2. Enforce. The basis for change at work begins with having policy as a guidepost. No matter the size of your business, you need policies in place to fall back on to enforce. Ensure your workplace has a clear harassment policy in place with specific actions to take should any disrespectful behaviour occur – regardless of level or position in the company. Check to see that your company has a policy, become familiar and communicate it. If they don’t have a policy, suggest it be implemented ASAP. You can be the catalyst for ensuring a harassment policy is in place, communicated and enforced.
 
3. Talk. Talk about harassment with your team, long before an issue occurs. When opportunities arise to reinforce, discuss behaviour openly, highlighting what is acceptable and what is not at work. Openly share stories about past personal experiences and state how you would handle it now. Immediately discuss any sign of disrespect you observe or hear about so your team know you will not tolerate it. Make your team aware that they each have a role to play in keeping the workplace safe, people who stay silent are complicit; give them the courage to speak up. You create the environment of open dialogue.
 
4. Act. In the best work environments ‘respect in the workplace’ is a foundational training piece for all employees so they understand what behaviour is expected of them and what to expect in return. Many people go through training but notice when management doesn’t consistently follow through when something occurs, so they clam up. Be the one who acts swiftly. People want to work for leaders who readily step up and take responsibility for the wellbeing of their people.  They will know you care enough about both the ‘bully’ and the bullied to deal with bad behaviour head on. Any form of bullying or inappropriate behaviour should be investigated and acted upon with appropriate discipline, without delay. Action begins with you, not HR.
 
5. Listen. Treat any form of harassment claim with urgency, seriousness and respect by hearing out those who have the courage to speak up, suspending your own judgement. Ensure a proper investigation is done while taking steps to protect the complainant from any form of retribution. Active listening shows them you care, understand and can be trusted to help. Listening with empathy is a key leadership trait.
 
6. Speak Up. By respectfully speaking out for those who feel harassed at work, you quickly become a powerhouse leader of tomorrow. Inappropriate behaviour at work is not OK; it is never to be tolerated. By speaking up and supporting others who speak out you will be the leader everyone wants to work for.
 
Take a Stand
You make choices everyday for how you treat others, we all do. If someone chooses to be a jerk or worse, an aggressor, then they should face appropriate consequences for their actions, regardless of their position in a company or organization. But it takes strong leadership to follow through with these people and take deliberate action. Take a stand! 
 
As a leader you have the ability to choose what your team’s workplace should be like, irrespective of the culture or industry you’re in, or whether you have an HR team. YOU can be the shining example to others in management. YOU count to the people who report to you and how you act during the toughest times will be a key differentiator to their lives. 
 
I’m here if you need guidance to manage tough leadership situations. Send me an email if you want support to develop policy or practices to enforce a respectful workplace or you’re struggling with a difficult issue and want a coach to talk it through.

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