Building a Kick-Ass Team From the Ground Up Part 3 - Bust Through the Barriers

How to Deal With 'New Team' CONFLICT

---

Welcome to Part 3 of our series, Building a Kick-Ass Team From the Ground Up. 

So far we covered the initial two foundational phases of building a kick-ass team: The Start Up Phase and Building the Team Identity. Now, it’s time to talk about everyone’s favourite topic – CONFLICT!

Truth is, conflict creates barriers to success of a newly forming team.
 
At some point, even with a solid team that’s working together, there will be bumps in the road. It can get wobbly.
 
Think of team building like first starting to ride a bike without training wheels. First you’re up and rolling along, but then you may begin to wobble. You're careful you don't overcorrect in an attempt to save yourself or you know you'll fall flat on your face…it is the same for a newly formed team.
 
So, here’s how to handle your team’s wobbly period the right way:  

Building a Kick-Ass Team From the Ground Up Part 3 - Bust Through the Barriers Video

We all need to feel seen! 

​Show Up!
Right now is the single most important time for you as a leader to be really present! Since this is when your team is actually settling in, the dynamics of different people sets off a whole chain of events and awkward reactions.

Make sure you’re easily accessible and frequently visible so you can address concerns immediately.
 
Kick-Ass Team Tip - MBWA:
Ever heard of MBWA?  Management By Walking Around is a great success habit for any leader.  An unstructured random walk around (virtually or in person) to check in with your team demonstrates your interest; it’s a deliberate strategy to get to know your people and will give you a chance to redirect and course-correct as friction develops; because it will develop.
 
Think T.E.A.M!
As different personalities emerge, conflict and power struggles will surely arise. This period is when you’ll hear the most resistance from your people and a lot of questioning about why and how you and/or the company are doing things. They will be coming to you to stick-handle the others.
 
In addition, polarization or splinter groups can occur as your people start to choose who they like and who they don’t.

In the worst-case scenarios you'll encounter open and vocal power struggles, when people just can't get along, these can be difficult to manage.
 
Manage through this challenging phase using T.E.A.M. strategies…
 
1. Talk it Out
We each filter what we hear, based on our own personal vantage point, coloured by previous experiences and jaded by our own distinct behavioural style.

During this phase of your team building process you might notice your team divides as some disagree with approaches or need to be heard before they ‘buy in’. 
 
Before a team can really work well together, you will likely have to help them work through their differences, and the best way to do that is by talking it out.
 
Bring the team together in a workshop to discuss issues that seem to cause confusion or frustration.

You’ll need to actively listen to uncover the root issues vs. just hearing more about the conflict, to facilitate the solution.

In some cases you may have to veto the dissent. If so, bring the team back to the norms agreed to in Part Two for Building a Kick-Ass Team from the Ground Up - Building Team Identity. 

The more you reinforce HOW the team should deal with issues together, the better. Over time it won't just be you leading through issues, they will begin to help one another manage through once they feel more comfortable and less vulnerable with one another.
 
2. Eat Together
This may seem like an odd strategy for building a team, but I assure you, the more often you eat together, the higher the camaraderie and engagement! 
 
The concept of ‘breaking bread’ may have a spiritual connotation to some, but the truth is, when you eat with a group of people, it creates an environment of meaningful social interaction.
 
Eating together improves connectedness at a very basic human level, and as such, people’s ego’s leave the room. Everyone opens up and gets to know each other on an even playing field.
 
Consider these inexpensive ideas for eating together as a team: (footnote: yes you can do some of this virtually too)

• Host a monthly breakfast/lunch (virtual or in person) Book a favourite place near the office, or have everyone bring their food to the virtual meeting, just to connect.  If in person,  invite the team to enjoy a meal before work – Fridays are always a terrific day to connect.
  
  Whether you buy for everyone or you all go ‘dutch’, breakfast together is quite inexpensive and a great way to start the day.

             For virtual teams, if you have budget, send them a meal kit to make virtually - simultaneously

• Host an office potluck (in person). Choose a theme, rally volunteers to assist with set up and coordinate menu items to avoid duplicates.
  
  These are great for celebratory events such as St Patrick’s Day, Valentine’s Day, Canada Day and Thanksgiving, but you can always do cultural food sharing or family favourite desserts between holidays!
  
  
• Buy cake for birthdays (virtual or in person). I’m not sure what it is about cake – maybe it’s because it’s such an indulgent dessert, but this is hands down one of the simplest team bonding “meals” to do. You not only are you honouring someone’s birthday, but the team will always look forward to the cake.
  
  In person, find a good quality baker and make a small investment to ensure the cakes are extra special.
  

            For virtual teams - send cupcakes through Uber Eats

• Visit the food court together (in person) I’m sure we all agree it would be great if you, as the leader, could buy everyone lunch. But the fact is, in most workplaces today, that is seldom possible.
  
  Instead, encourage everyone to step out of the office and go out to lunch at the nearby food court. Not only will you get to spend some quality time together, but everyone can eat what they want!
  

            

• Enjoy a pizza lunch (virtual or in person) Pizza is simple, inexpensive and (almost) everyone loves it. Often you can afford to feed a large group on your own dime.
  
  It’s one of those foods you can’t go wrong with… not to mention everyone will appreciate getting a paid-for meal!
  

            For virtual teams - send pizza through Uber Eats   

• Just meet up. Grab an office or boardroom that’s big enough for the group and invite your team to bring their lunch.
  
  It’s a simple way to get everyone together and recharged for the rest of the day.
  
  

3.  Appreciate
There isn’t a human alive who doesn’t want to be appreciated. Being valued helps us reinforce our own sense of personal self worth.
 
When someone has noticed you, or you’ve been acknowledged for your work, you’ll feel well respected and more important AND, as a result, you’ll want stay part of such as kick-ass team!
 
According to Gallup Research, “The best managers promote a recognition-rich environment, with praise coming from every direction and everyone aware of how others like to receive appreciation.

​This type of employee feedback should be frequent -- Gallup recommends every seven days -- and timely to ensure that the employee knows the significance of the recent achievement and to reinforce company values.”
 
Kick Ass Team Tip - Appreciation

• Set up a time during your regular team meeting to do, what I like to call, “Shoutouts”. Ask your team to provide you with the names of those on their team who have lived the values or norms you’ve been talking about and then announce them at the meeting. Be sure to share what they’ve done to earn the public display of appreciation. 
• Use company recognition tools, such as thank you cards or point systems, to publicly acknowledge the good work of your people.
• Personal handwritten notes, when written in a meaningful way, are THE BEST way to show appreciation. The recipient is sure to remember the act of gratitude, particularly if the note is from their leader or a very senior member of their company. Many people keep handwritten notes for years!

4. Meet
During this stress-filled conflict period, you’ll likely be pulled in many directions – you’re going to be a very popular person!

In order to provide the comfort and assurance your team are looking for, it’s important to host regular check-in meetings, with purpose.
 
There’s also another reason why regularly scheduled (and attended!) meetings will pay off. Believe it or not, it’s one of the key ingredients in developing THE single most important factor of a kick ass team – you develop trust.
 
Your team wants to (actually, needs to) hear from you…often. Don’t assume they are fine to just get to work – when barriers are forming is exactly when your team needs your connection and oversight the most.

Through this phase you’ll want to set more touch points than usual to manage expectations, head off issues and communicate progress or changes.
 
Kick Ass Team Tip - Meeting Etiquette:

• Make sure every meeting has a purpose, agenda and a chairperson.
• Meetings should have a suitable timeframe, which is adhered to. Start on time, AND end on time, or earlier.
• If the meeting includes video or conference calls, ensure you set the expectations for all attendees. The Muse 27 Unwritten Rules of Conference Calls is a great resource for this.
• Any content or topics to discuss should be sent well ahead of the meeting.
• The chairperson (doesn't always have to be you) should manage the group so that no one monopolizes discussions. To do this, the chairperson must seek input from those who remain quiet, or go around the room for input, limiting time to answer.
• Follow up after the meeting by sending attendees their action items.

Ideal Meetings for Kick Ass Teams (Yes, all of these during team formation!)

• Daily huddle with your direct reports to review progress, engage in open dialogue for issue resolution, manage expectations, head off rumours and discuss team performance. Great first thing in the AM. The group setting will help you gauge friction between teams.
  
  
• Weekly, all hands, full team meetings (presuming you have several teams reporting through to you) have a standing agenda for status updates, progress reports/statistics/measurements, share learning and team ‘shoutouts’. Additional agenda items can be added as needed. Note: Typically people in large group are rather quiet.
  
  
• Weekly one-on-one touch points with each individual direct report. This should be their meeting, which means they should set their own agenda and guide the discussion. This meeting provides them with access to your guidance and advice during this challenging period.
  
  Avoid monopolizing the discussion, instead let them update you on any challenges they require help with or provide you with updates about their team.
  
  Once a month, use one touch point meeting as a performance discussion and every other month use one as a development discussion – making these a scheduled time demonstrates the importance of your team’s development and make time to discuss  HOW they are working with others so you can provide feedback.
  
  
• Once or twice annually, host ‘skip level’ meetings with the individuals who report under your direct report team, without their manager present.
  
  You may also consider having an external person meet with them to gather insights on what has been working and, more importantly, what has not! Commit to follow up with an action plan.

Once your team is performing consistently well, move the daily meetings to once a week or touch-point meetings into bi-weekly; you’ll know when, as the meetings become less productive!
 
The Bust Through Barriers phase of team formation can be a very draining time for you as a leader. You'll be called upon to referee and manage conflict and be pulled in multiple directions. 

It is a vital time for your team and can be a make it or break it period in the dynamics of your team.

Give Dots Leadership Solutions a call if you need help, we can do individual behavioural assessments, facilitate meetings or work through conflict and coach you through difficult conversations.

We want to hear from you - comment below about your own experience going through this conflict filled phase about how you busted through the barriers?
 
Check out the next article of this series - Building a Kick-Ass Team From the Ground Up – Part 4 – Kum Ba YES! 

This is the phase when team identity really shows, everyone understands why they are on the team, there are established rules and processes and the team culture really begins to come to life.  
During the next phase of team formation your role, as the leader, takes on a slightly different course of action.

Summary - Bust Through the Barriers

• Make a practice to Manage By Walking Around
• Talk it out went conflict arises
• Eat together to have time to properly connect and develop rapport
• Deliberately take time to show appreciation - everyone needs to feel seen
• Plan for very regular team meetings that have specific purpose during team formation